Dear Madam President
If you don’t know already then you will know soon kim jong un got blown to the moon by your nukes or mina or maybe it was China I just couldn’t wait to commiserate Oh, what a pity about New York City But I’m so glad you had your underground Since DC proper is no longer around But Madam President, wer’re still standing Question is, where will you be landing You and I both know this to be true Every country in the world wants a piece of you And since you’ll soon be asking me for aid you gotta know up front I gotta get paid So let’s have a consortium, just you and me You give me what I want so you remain free At least for now, temporarily
Now its no mystery, just look at our history We got where we got cause we got what we got and we’re gonna get more just to run up the score If you want a helping hand you gotta give up some land
So here is the deal that would work out best Give me Iowa and Texas and you keep the rest Ok maybe one more state that could suit me right A state I could fill with my military might You’ve got those two big air fields in Nebraska I’ll take that state too if that’s not too much to Aska
Oh wait, oh wait you got that other state The one that sounds like Nebraska but is really called Alaska I’m sure you remember stealing that from me I need it back for protection on the sea
Now there is one more state that might be up my alley That one on the ocean that has that Silicon Valley And there madam president you have my tally Iowa, Nebraska, Alaska, Texas and Cali Give me all those states and you can be my palli
Let’s have a consortium, just you and me You give me what I want so you remain free At least for now, temporarily
Sincerely
Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin
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